Dad turns 69
Christmas changes when you're retired. There is a lull in Christmas that exists at no other time in your life. I've done Christmas for 36 years now, know all the ins and outs of Christmas purchases, wrapping, cardding, baking, cooking, etc., etc. Some of the ritual has even become departmentalized; I know what groceries to purchase for the annual goodies without writing them down, finished all Christmas gifts so long ago that I've already begun January sewing, which has nothing to do with Christmas!! So, there's been a lull--a hiatus--the last few days that is a calm before the storm. Today, Darla and I are doing a Christmas project that will probably take well into the night, and Monday will be filled with shopping and baking, the hiatus over.
There have been unique experiences this Christmas. Last year, we received a Christmas card from a dead man; this year a card from ....... This year there's been lots and lots of snow, although there probably won't be a white Christmas unless Vale's prayer for a white Christmas can negate the prayers of thousands of travelers who want to get home safely for Christmas. We pooped out on our Christmas decorations this year; the house is beautifully and elaborately decorated by most standards, but one day we just said, "We've done enough," and packed up what wasn't done and put it away for next year. Tom and I have no gifts for each other under the tree, although we are expecting Nancy Newyear, who will bring a fancy new camera. We just can't think of anything we want or need enough to wrap and put under the tree. Objects don't seem important. Don't misunderstand; nothing has changed for us; we're just in that Christmas hiatus--that lull. In our shopping tomorrow, we may find gifts for one another which just have to be bought and shared on Christmas morn, but so far.....
This Christmas has been more nostalgic, more about reminiscings and rememberings than others I can remember. We've laughed until our sides ached through several hundred old slides we found which depict the early years of our life together--side burns, horn-rimmed glasses, trim bodies, and tiny children, sniffled our way through several old nostalgic Christmas movies that we would have ignored just a year or two ago, stood looking at Christmas displays and half-melted snowmen for several minutes rather than with a fleeting glance. I think, it's the luxury of being older of not being subject to deadlines, of smelling the roses.
Tom turned 69 yesterday. He looks to me just the same as he did in March of 1971 when he peeked in my apartment window, and I fell instantly, eternally in love with him. Age has added some wonderful smile lines and crow's feet and a greyish sheen to his hair, but his spirit and personality haven't diminished in any way. He has treated me as a queen all our married lives; there have never been harsh words of any kind, no criticism, no doubting me. A raised eyebrow perhaps, a quick sigh, but full acceptance of who I am. He is a true renaisance man; I think I have the term right. He is a gentleman, a hard worker, a caring father, a loving grandfather. He's sentimental, loves chick flicks and sentimental movies, watches three or four shows at once on tv, devours the current political scene with enthusiasm but can walk away when he feels he is too consumed or upset. He is a scriptorian, a Biblical scholar, and a living testament of what he believes. He's witty; he can be a tease...He's a good, good man, and I still wonder, after nearly 37 years of knowing him intimately, how all the stars aligned so perfectly to bring him into my life!! I will never know, but I think, knowing my luck on some other levels, that it is best not to question, best to enjoy... Cheers, Mom
This is how Steve really looked in 1979!! It's probably the same shirt, since we exchanged hand-me-downs often. Tommy is the baby; Grandma Kennedy is there because Tommy was blessed on that day. The little guy with no shirt on is Zach Panhorst.
This is how Aunt Joan and I look now. How could I have made such a silly mistake??
I end 2007 thinking of a topic which I've already addressed in an earlier blog. Forgiveness. Forgiving ourselves. Forgiving others. I watched a brief tv interview concerning the fact that putting aside anger and grudges is good for one's physical health. I really believe that we could have a much happier 2008 if we would set aside our grudges, our perceived slights from others, etc. and MOVED ON. Many, many years ago a friend, who had been my roommate for several years, came to me in tears. She was to give a church lesson on forgiveness and felt that she had to ask my forgiveness before she could give the lesson. She sobbed uncontrollably, but she never did tell me what she had done for which I should forgive her! I forgave her, of course, but I still don't know of what I forgave her. The experience taught me an important lesson about moving on. I've tried to practice this principle ever since. However, I've seen so many stories recently on the news of the sad, sad results of not being able to forgive and move on. Let us not find ourselves in that position!! So, here's to moving on in 2008. Love and hugs. Mom
What has been the most fun of all is that, for the first time in a long, long time Darla and I have been able to work on a project together. We've thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. There's been a sweetness about our project because it hasn't been for ourselves. Now, she's leaving me to clean up the disorganized sewing room!! Ah, well...what's new?? Cheers from the windy, rainy climes. Mom
