RIDING OUT THE STORM

There are many kinds of storms, and, at this day and time, I'm riding out a few of them. None are serious--just adjustments to a different life style--temporary at best--here in Guam as we await the birth of Mason.

The first storm is potty training. As you'll notice in these pictures, Ivan, Marie's youngest, is usually dressed in a t-shirt and pullups because we are potty training!! Since I potty-trained five children, I assumed that I could manage that task for Marie with Ivan, who is developmentally delayed. My oh my...cut my tongue out. I've been getting my daily exercise by chasing Ivan all over the house, attempting to get him on the "potty train." His reward for toileting properly is "potty candy." An oxymoron if I've ever heard one. Our conversations in the bathroom have been, if nothing else, hilarious!

Me: Ivan, I'd like you to potty in the toilet just like your big brothers.

Ivan: My big brothers can shoot droids, and I can shoot the droids....as he flushes the toilet several times, tips over the toothbrush holder, and plays with the bathtub toys...but no job done. I am, however, determined. I am also attempting to potty train to the dog who loves nothing better than to do his morning business in the boys' room. This too has been my daily aerobic exercise and my voice exercises..."Close your door!! Astro's headed for the bedroom!!" "Boys, run back and close your bedroom door--now!" And so it goes.

The next storm is the air conditioning. It is so hot and humid here that the a/c runs all the time. Thus, the pictures of children in shorts, wrapped in blankets. For those wondering about the rainbow blanket, it is already a much-used accessory. This particular storm, the blanket brigade, is accompanied by storms of: "Clean your place at the lunch table, have you done your morning chores, I know you don't want to (fill in the blank), but your mother wants you to (fill in the blank.)" These constant tirades remind me constantly of my days as a young mother with young children.

The third storm has to do with living in the tropics. Every day there is a brief tropical storm accompanied by constant heat, so the wonderful play area which is mere feet from Marie's back door remains empty most of the day. Summer vacation in Guam is similar to winter vacation in colder climates. Cooped up--cramped area--not enough to do. "I'm bored," they say to which I reply, "Shall I find you something to do?" "I'm hungry," they complain. "I've watched all these movies, video games, computer games, etc.," and it's only June!!

I'm truly not complaining. I love my Marie with her bubbly optimism, wonderful, funny mothering, and our projects. Ben is strong and silent--a true patriarch to his family. The kids are kids--funny and funky. Tom is at home working far too hard and keeping Vale entertained, and we both agree that we're lonesome but not alone....There is always a rainbow at the end of the storm. Love from Guam--where America's day begins. Mom

A WALK WITH ETHAN

Here in Guam, beauty is everywhere--swaying palm trees, flowers of bright oranges, reds, and blues, colorful tourist buses and jitneys, heart-stopping sunsets, and a truly azure ocean. My pictures are a bit jumbled, and I'm not at my own computer so....bear with me.

My grandson, Ethan, and I take a walk every morning. If we're not out and about by 6am, we are in for an excessively warm walk. Our path looks about like the picture. I am a number of steps behind, and Etan is ahead talking a mile a minute. Ethan is Ethan Thomas, named for his Grandfather Kennedy, and he is well-named. At eight, Ethan is a sweet, sensitive, responsible boy, bright, and interested in helping everyone. He is an artist and a philosopher, and he's taken on the responsibility of teaching me about nature and life and love as we walk the dog, Astro. Some Ethanisms: I said: "Oh look, Ethan, it rained last night." "That's dew, Grandma. Dew comes up and rain comes down."

Ethan is concerned that it is his duty to inform people how to get themselves physically fit, so he made a number of fitness signs which he taped to all the stop signs in the neighborhood. Of the poster, he said: "You can tell how a person is feeling if you look at their eyes." He then demonstrated sad eyes, happy eyes, mad eyes, etc. for me. Then he said: "My dog in the poster has sad eyes because he wants people to be happy." In case you can't read the poster, it says: "Don't be like a dog. Don't sweet out of your tounge."

The home in the picture is 47 Poincianna Circle where the Turners live. Anywhere you look, there are swaying palm trees. The little park is directly behind their house.

The next picture isn't great, but if you'll look along the aerial, at the roofline, there is a shadow of a huge "boonie" bee. Everything that is bad, abandoned, run-down, etc. in Guam is "boonie." I am to look out for "boonie" bees because their stings are awful bad, and Ethan will show you all the places he's been bitten if you ask.

If you look in the center of the house, you'll see a bird on the wing. A lady jogging by told us there was a parakeet loose, and Ethan found him by pretending he was a parakeet.

Our four year old grandson, Ivan, is developmentally delayed, and water of any kind thrills and delights him, so Ethan wanted to get out the wading pool for Ivan. Being a northwesterner, I explained that he should fill the pool with water right after our early morning walk so it would have time to warm up before they played in the pool. He was puzzled by my advice, but being the pleaser that he is, he filled the pool. The truth is that the water out of the tap is never cold in Guam!!
The biggest news so far is that Connor, age 7, just lost his fourth tooth! It took him all day to wiggle it loose, but here's the proof.
I do miss my sweetheart, but I'm feeling useful, even if I may not be....I love all of you!! Baby Mason is making his presence known with his own kicking and pushing, but his doctors want him to stay in the womb just a bit longer. We'll see who has the stronger will!! Love to All. Mom

IF I THINK TOO MUCH, I MIGHT CRY AGAIN

I've never intended my blog to be a forum for unloading my troubles or stresses or for complaining about this and that. How can I complain about my life? I'm retired, with time on my hands to do all the things I love; I'm serving a mission for my church--giving back a little of what I've been given; I have the love of a beautiful family, who, though their lives have ups and downs, are consistently upbeat and supportive; a dear, dear husband who is patient, loving, and a great friend. So, my title may be a bit misleading...my tears have been flowing a lot the past week or two but...I'm tough. I'll be returning, tomorrow, to Guam for a while to help care for Marie's family while they bring baby number five into the world. Such a trip has mixed blessings. I'm very grateful to be healthy enough to care for them and don't begrudge one second of the time I'll be spending on a tropical island with loved ones, but I'm already anticipating how I will miss my husband!! We've been inseparable for years now. We're best friends, buddies, compadres, sharing laughs, jokes, foibles, failings, everything. We just celebrated our 38th anniversary. We go together...Ah well...I'm tough!

Life has been lots of fun lately. Our daily routine wouldn't inspire too many, but we're having a great time. Dad has worked hard on the yard, the woodpile, the rock wall, the deck, and his menagerie. If you look closely, you'll see that the engineer of this little train is a squirrel. Our yard is filled with squirrels, birds, quails, raccoons, and the occasional cat! All the drama of life acted out in the lives of these little critters. One little guy taught a particularly poignant lesson. We had a rental car for a few days, and we kept hearing an odd sound--over and over and over. It was this small sparrow attacking an enemy who was threatening his family. He was seeing his own reflection in the car's bumper and attacked the "enemy" over and over from dawn until dusk. Dad took the car to the wood pile one day and smeared some dirt on the bumper, so our little guy moved to the side of the car and repeated his agonizing attack. His futile actions reminded me that there are often times in our lives when we attack our problems in the same way as this little father--we cannot move on, and we simply repeat, uselessly, the same solutions that have never worked before. We beat ourselves up over problems we can't solve in a manner that has seemingly worked for us before. We haven't seen our little friend since we returned the rental, so, hopefully, he's moved on. There's great value on in moving on from that which we can't do anything about.

I have found a complication in my life in the form of a quilt for Ethan. I wanted something simple--after all, if I achieve my goal of quilts for all my grandchildren and children in my lifetime, I need to get going. So, I chose a "simple" pattern and have had nothing but trouble with what I've dubbed the rainbow quilt. I've made so many mistakes, picked them out, started again, goofed again, and started over. Now, there is a difference between me and the little daddy bird--each time I've learned a little more, made corrections, and tried again. Many times, I've wanted to just throw away what I've started, but I'd invested too much money in the material, plus my stubborn Kennedy genes wouldn't let me give up. I spent a lot of time getting advice and help from Aunt Joan, my friends, and even your dad. The rainbow quilt is finished and ready to deliver to Ethan. Do you think he'll know that there are so many mistakes in this quilt that it would never pass the critical eye of other quilters, or will the little label that says: "My Grandma Loves Me" be what he remembers??

Sometimes in this grand adventure we call life, there are times when the only real solution is to rid ourselves of the problem. Anyone recognize this hole? It's the old Beachum house which has stood on Maple Avenue for years--never changing, never improving, never making an effort for self-improvement, becoming an eyesore in the neighborhood. Someone finally gave it a decent burial!! I think that's a good way to rid ourselves of some old problems and bad feelings and useless grudges.

Tomorrow I'll get a stamp on my passport and an opportunity to serve, and I'll trust that all of you will remember that your dad is home alone. Pester him with phone calls, prayers, and visits. He and Vale have a busy month planned, and so do I!! I intend to share chicken on a stick with Connor, book talk discussions with Harmony, some art sessions with Ethan, long talks and laughs with Marie, maybe Ben can teach me how to use the WII, some DS adventures with Ivan and cuddles from Mason. I'll sit on Marie's porch in the midst of a tropical storm and remind myself that I am loved, cherished, and still teeth-chatteringly, heart-stoppingly in love with a guy I've only known for 38 years, as eternity stretches before me....Love to you all. Mom

“Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."

-Christopher Robin to Pooh

A TRAVELOGUE.....FULFILLING A PROMISE

In the last few weeks, we've traveled to Idaho--for temple visits and overnight stay with cousins, Peggy and Terry. We enjoyed two huge meals and a visit to "Death Valley," the retirement village where Terry and Peggy have a home!!
Then on to Kanab, Utah, a favorite spot of ours--ask Vale about The Three Bears Bakery. Kanab is known as "Little Hollywood" because many Westerns were filmed in the area!! You can see whose room we stayed in; we swear the pillows are the same ones Maverick slept on!!

Alas, no pictures of our stop in Sedona, AZ to visit Kevin and Debbie and enjoy a huge Southern meal fixed for us by Debbie's stepmom!
Then, to Mesa to visit our favorite Desert Dwellers:

By plane to Champaign, Illinois for the graduation!!

Then, to Springfield, Illinois where we saw flooding, Abraham Lincoln historic sites, and interesting spots along historic Route 66.

W

We returned home to spring in all her glory!!

Yawn...remembering all that traveling makes me sleepy!! We're headed out tomorrow to decorate family graves....yawn...I'd better take a nap! Love from Mom

BLANK PAGE, BLANK MIND

It really isn't that I have a blank mind, just a mind in random free fall...what, of all that's happened, should I write about??? Well....there's a visit from...drum roll please...our kissin' cousins from North Carolina...the Kennedys. A few months ago, we became acquainted with Dad's cousin and his wife, James and Margaret Kennedy, from Fayetteville, NC. We've been exchanging emails, genealogy info, etc. James' grandfather, Donald, is the brother of Dad's father; but our side of the family never met James because of a divorce. It was so fun to connect when James and Margaret came for a visit. Instant connection, lots of talking, touring, eating...all the ingredients for a warm friendship!!

And there's Grandma's birthday party. A smashing success with lots of wonderful refreshments provided by all the ladies of the family, a nice gathering hosted by Aunt Marian, and a good time had by all.

On our way home, we found these:

We were not very far from the log cabin where Mark and Tricia lived. No, we didn't buy one...this time. I've already asked for an external hard drive for Mother's Day, but we're going to get one or two for our lawn for a 38th wedding anniversary gift. Yes, 38 years together...in June. The man who built these has over 30 birdhouses up in his yard, and we talked with him about our home menageries!!

Today is Mother's Day. I am feeling blessed for the opportunity of being a mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother. I'm proud of my daughters and daughters-in-law who face many more challenges than I did as a mother and are rearing my sweet grandchildren and great grands. Many years ago, over thirty now, I dreaded Mother's Day because I had no children, but I soon got over that. Now, I only dread Mother's Day church programs because, in the speakers' praises of the perfect mothers, we real-life, not-so-perfect mothers begin to squirm and feel a bit uncomfortable, remembering our shortcomings...ah well. I'm off to church--late because of a call from Mark, the first who made me a mother, and my makeup's already ruined, and....I love you all. Kiss your babies and your spouses...Love from here. Mom

AHHHH......

Need I say more about the weeks of work!! It is a beautiful room. The beat now moves outside for yard work!!
I have to tell you Grandma's funny story before I forget. Some of you may not know that Grandma has, for several years, received, almost daily, calls from a collection agency for a Marguerite Kennedy. Being of a generation too polite to be rude, Grandma has always answered the calls and patiently explained that she isn't Marguerite Kennedy. She did tell me that she found out a few years ago, that her birth certificate does have her name misspelled as Margarite Bailey. Recently, these calls have increased to the point of being made three and four times a day and ringing for as long as five minutes, so we took some action and got her on the NoCall database, registered a complaint, and convinced her that it isn't rude to not answer calls from a scam company. Yesterday, she said her phone rang off and on all day long and for several minutes each time. She ignored it for as long as she could. Finally, she picked up the phone and yelled into it, "Why do you keep calling me? I don't know why you keep calling." Just as she was hanging up, she heard a quiet little voice say,"Because....you're my mother...." A little girl had a wrong number. So funny!!

Love to you all from the spoiled lady in her beautiful kitchen!! Mom

'How did it go so fast?' we'll say as we are looking back. And then we'll understand - we held gold dust in our hands" - Tori Amos

THE BEAT GOES ON

Today is Easter Sunday. It's nearly 6am, and I've been staring at the blank page of my blog for a while. I am usually eager to share the events--mundane as they are--of our week, so that family and friends scattered throughout the world will know that we're still alive, still hanging on, and doing our thing. This week, however, our life seems more mundane than usual. There are no real highs or real lows--just a comfortable moving forward with the projects and prospects of feathering our nest and readying it for the visitors who will grace us with their sweet presence throughout the spring and summer.

I am still sewing and decorating; Dad is hammering and painting. We've gone from this:

To this:

To this:

There is still a new counter to be installed on Wednesday and the wall/shelf decorations to be arranged. Some of you will be saddened--hmmm...ha....that the mountain man is no more. He's relegated to guarding the wood pile. Encouraged to know that dad's dog has had a long needed bath, and Molly Bear is not far behind. The refrigerator is doing some rumbling that sounds suspiciously like a death rattle, but....we're moving on--outdoors...to lawn projects and unburdening the gazebo of its winter storage of garden rocks, lawn furniture, and empty flower pots.

We have forgone the chocolate Easter bunnies, baskets, and colored eggs side of Easter this year for the sake of our health and our waistlines. Wait...there were those Cadbury eggs at our class the other night...

However the real reason for the season has not been ignored, and we have been moved and uplifted by a recent Easter message from Jeffrey R. Holland, one of the general authorities of our Church. Elder Holland's is posted many places on the internet. I, however, haven't figured out how to post the video of his talk on my blog, but you can watch/listen to the full text at: http://www.fromthedust.org/2009/04/10/mormon-messages-none-were-with-him-jeffrey-r-holland/ In this world of so much turmoil and chaos, his words were especially relevant and moving. My favorite part is this:

With all the conviction of my soul I testify that He did please His Father perfectly and that a perfect Father did not forsake His Son in that hour. Indeed, it is my personal belief that in all of Christ’s mortal ministry the Father may never have been closer to His Son than in these agonizing final moments of suffering. Nevertheless, that the supreme sacrifice of His Son might be as complete as it was voluntary and solitary, the Father briefly withdrew from Jesus the comfort of His Spirit, the support of His personal presence. It was required; indeed it was central to the significance of the Atonement, that this perfect Son who had never spoken ill nor done wrong nor touched an unclean thing had to know how the rest of humankind—us, all of us—would feel when we did commit such sins. For His Atonement to be infinite and eternal, He had to feel what it was like to die not only physically but spiritually, to sense what it was like to have the divine Spirit withdraw, leaving one feeling totally, abjectly, hopelessly alone.
But Jesus held on. He pressed on. The goodness in Him allowed faith to triumph even in a state of complete anguish. The trust He lived by told Him in spite of His feelings that divine compassion is never absent, that God is always faithful, that He never flees nor fails us. When the uttermost farthing had then been paid, when Christ’s determination to be faithful was as obvious as it was utterly invincible, finally and mercifully, it was “finished.” Against all odds and with none to help or uphold Him, Jesus of Nazareth, the living Son of the living God, restored physical life where death had held sway and brought joyful, spiritual redemption out of sin, hellish darkness and despair. With faith in the God He knew was there, He could say in triumph, “Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit.”
Brothers and sisters, one of the great consolations of this Easter season is that because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so. His solitary journey brought great company for our little version of that path—the merciful care of our Father in Heaven, the unfailing companionship of this Beloved Son, the consummate gift of the Holy Ghost, angels in heaven, family members on both sides of the veil, prophets and apostles, teachers, leaders, friends. All of these and more have been given as companions for our mortal journey because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the Restoration of His gospel. Trumpeted from the summit of Calvary is the truth that we will never be left alone nor unaided, even if sometimes we may feel that we are. Truly the Redeemer of us all said, “I will not leave you comfortless. [My Father and] I will come to you [and abide with you].”

For all of you whom I love so much, remember that I am one of those family members, friends, companions who was given as your companion for your mortal journey. I don't have much in a material way, but...I have total and absolute faith--unwavering and well-tested. in the existence of God, in His power to hold us in the hollow of His hand and guide us through this frail existence. I can pray for you and with you; I can listen, hold your hand, and give you a swift kick if that's what you need!! I will always be here...lowly servant that I am. All my love, Mom